Tuesday, June 10, 2025

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Team America: Trailer For ‘Red Dawn’ Remake Lands With Flag-Waving Fury

nullAmerica, fuck yeah! Are you wearing your stars-and-stripes underoos? If so, then get ready for a healthy dose of patriotism the only way Hollywood knows how — by remaking a movie and blowing shit up real good.

The trailer for the long delayed "Red Dawn" remake has landed, and it's about as simplistic and dumb as it gets. The plot concerns a bunch of Chinese North Koreans who someone manage to fly an entire squadron of planes over to America without any radar anywhere in the world noticing, nor any of the nation's allies stepping in to help fight. And you thought Batman walking on ice was a logic leap! From there a band of teenage heroes, with 2 Aussie actors and Tom Cruise's son among them, manage to outwit military veterans and eventually take back the country or whatever.

Anyway, unlike "Cabin In The Woods," which was worth the wait, this Chris Hemsworth vehicle could've stayed on the shelf. Sing the national anthem on November 21st.

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  1. That was fantastic. Though man I miss the Nicaraguans invading. That was a some realistic geopolitics right there. I was hoping in the remake it would be Liechtenstein.

  2. You guys are a punch of blue state communist anarchists nihilists if you don't love this trailer. America is such a great country we only cast Australians as heroic US marines!

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