In Theaters: ‘G.I. Joe,’ ‘Julie & Julia,’ ‘Paper Heart’

Is it Friday again already? These summer weeks just seem to fly by. Of course, the forgettable tripe Hollywood produces regularly can hardly qualify as a milestone. This weekend’s mainstream offerings continue the tried-and-true triad of ‘action /blockbuster, comedy/ romance, and horror/ thriller.’ As for limited release, if the names Paul Giamatti and Charlyne Yi excite you, this might not be a bad weekend to venture to the theater.

The story of this weekend’s box office battlefield is probably more interesting than any of the stories it is depicting, but no less predictable: American bad-asses vs. Julia Child vs. … Steve Zahn? Seriously, Paramount’s ‘G.I. Joe’ should have little problem taking the hill this time around; according to tracking, ‘Joe’ is sparking strong interest among both young and older men and is expected to open north of fifty million. At $175 million to produce, it’d better. Meanwhile, Sony is hoping to ensnare the fairer sex with “Julie & Julia,” which is expected to open in the high teens. Rounding out the bunch is “A Perfect Getaway,” which you can expect to do unspectacular numbers in its opening weekend, suffering from the teen-stealing expansion of “500 Days of Summer.”

Starting with the 800-pound gorilla in the room, ‘G.I. Joe’ stars Dennis Quaid (‘Day After Tomorrow’), Marlon Wayans (“White Chicks”), and Sienna Miller (hot, push-up bra) as soldiers in a film based on action figures from the ’80s. Reviews for this have been scarce due to Paramount’s wisely wanting to avoid similar critical lambasting to that which ‘Transformers 2’ was exposed earlier this summer, not that it hurt its numbers any. Reviews keep trickling in, though, and the Tomatometer is steadily falling (55% when last we checked.) Directed by Stephen Sommers, who brought us such summer gems as “The Mummy Returns,” ‘Joe’ is exactly what you’d expect from essentially a spiritual sequel to ‘Transformers.’ The odds of this turning out to be an actual ‘feel-good’ summer movie, as opposed to a brain hemorrhage are slim, but if you dug the ‘Bots, go for it. Plus one of our writers saw it and said it was “enjoyable trash.” Uhhh, we might just have to take your word on that one.

Next up, we have “Julie & Julia,” a ‘culinary comedy’ starring Meryl Streep and Amy Adams (“Enchanted”) directed by Nora Ephron (“When Harry Met Sally”). Based on two books: Julia Child’s “My Life in France,” and Julia Powell’s cooking memoir that started as a blog, this uneven but enjoyable film is about two women separated by time and place but who share similar problems, aspirations, and eventually solutions in cooking. Currently at 63% on RT, with a slightly higher rating among top critics, ‘Julia’ seems like a pleaser, especially for foodies, and boasts some strong performances from Streep, Adams, and Stanley Tucci (“The Pelican Brief.”) Streep maintains her ability to make strange people interesting and real, and is probably the brightest point in this light but entertaining summer comedy.

Finally, we have “A Perfect Getaway,” starring Milla Jovovich (‘Resident Evil’) and Steve Zahn (“Saving Silverman”) as a young couple who go backpacking on their honeymoon in Hawaii, but soon find paradise becoming hellish as they battle for survival against other suspicious couples. Sound familiar? With a 48% “Fresh” rating on RT, this “Survivor”-esque thriller seems not worth seeing, but the top critics’ rating is a much more reasonable 78%. Seems like a case of a ‘B-movie’ being best enjoyed in a mock-ironic, non-straightforward way. There’s something to be said for that. Apparently there is a pretty strong need for ‘suspension of disbelief’ here, but I couldn’t imagine it requiring more than for say, giant robots? Might be worth a shot if you like thrillers.

In Limited Release: Lots of offerings this week for the offbeat moviegoer, with the ‘Godfather of Mumblecore’ Andrew Bujalski’s “Beeswax” and Charlyne Yi’s “Paper Heart” leading the pack for you emo people, but some depth with the Turkish film “Bliss,” a ‘surreal comedy’ with Paul Giamatti (“Cold Souls”), and finally another ‘B-movie’ with Dominic Monaghan (“Lost”) and Ron Perlman (“Hellboy”) called, “I Sell the Dead.”

Yi’s “Paper Heart,” with Michael Cera (“Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist”) is arguably the biggest of the pack, and has definitely gotten the most talk recently. A mockumentary about the character ‘Charlyne’s’ belief in true love, the film follows her journey for answers and advice about love as she talks with friends, strangers, scientists, bikers, romance novelists, and children. And of course she eventually meets and falls in magically atypical love with ‘Cera.’ With a 66% ‘Fresh’ rating on RT and a higher one for ‘top critics,’ it seems that it delivers on the promise of actually being funny and endearing and yes, we basically felt that exact way. Also we’re big fans of the music and songs most of which are written by Cera, Yi and friends and some that are written and c0-written by more well-known musicians like Zach Condon of Beirut and Alden Penner ex of The Unicorns.

We did not enjoy the dour and tedious “Cold Souls” at all, but for some reason many critics on RT do (82% ‘Fresh,’ no accounting for taste there). It reminded us of a Charlie Kaufman film like ‘Eternal Sunshine,’ but an ineffectual one with none of the enjoyment. Watch the ‘Bart Sells His Soul’ episode of “The Simpsons” instead.

We saw “Beeswax” at the SXSW Film Festival in March, and enjoyed some of its naturalistic performances, but those of you who focus on set design and value things like lighting, craft and professionalism might want to avoid. It currently enjoys a 80% ‘Fresh’ rating on RT which seems to be overstating the film’s worth, but critics (especially indie-minded ones) tend to give mumblecore a pass just for showing up. The Turkish film “Bliss” is based on a novel that deals with controversial ‘honor killings’ and is finally coming to the U.S. after premiering to some acclaim at the 2007 Asian Film Festival. It has a 63% ‘Fresh’ Rating on RT . Lastly, Glenn McQuaid’s “I Sell the Dead” has only a 42%, but honestly looks kind of fun to us, because we like zombies. Then one again, one of our writers felt it wasn’t all that. – Joe Sedita