By now, unless you’re totally deaf to advance buzz or have been living on a Luddite commune for the last few weeks, you’ll be aware that Friday’s “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes” will open wide with a great groundswell of critical approval behind it (you can read our own extremely positive review here). Whether that will translate into box office is anyone’s guess, but the omens are in its favor: ‘Dawn’ seems destined to benefit from strong word of mouth, especially around Andy Serkis’ motion-capture performance, the trailers have been playing like gangbusters (even if their violence sparked complaints during the World Cup) and most importantly, it’s the sequel to the remarkably successful “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” which itself took nearly half a billion dollars worldwide.
The franchise, which has been so triumphantly rebooted, now consists of eight big-screen outings: the original 1968 Charlton Heston classic and its four sequels, the abortive reboot attempt that was Tim Burton’s 2001 film and now the two new Rupert Wyatt and Matt Reeves additions to the canon. To celebrate the release of ‘Dawn’ (and it is cause for celebration indeed) we’ve taken a helicopter view of the whole lot and ranked them in order of quality. If you’re planning a pre-’Dawn’ viewing session to get yourself in the mood, or if you leave the theater buzzing for more ape-on-human action, here’s our rundown of every ‘Planet of the Apes’ film, from worst to best:
8. “Planet of the Apes” (Tim Burton, 2001)
Of all the film ideas that do not benefit from being rendered in style-over-content form, perhaps the sci-fi story of an ape civilization that has risen to compete with the primacy of humankind is the most exemplary: what makes any “Planet of the Apes” film great is how thematically weighty it can be and how fertile a ground it provides for social and political allegory, not that it gives someone an excuse to spend loads of money making it look cool. But enter 2001-era Tim Burton who entirely seemed to mistake the surface of the concept for its substance (this was before this very tendency had fully manifested itself as his fatal flaw), and so managed to deliver a totally incoherent and tin-eared version of the story, while still spending $100 million on it. And in fairness to him, a lot of that money is up there on the screen: Rick Baker’s make up and creature effects are pretty outstanding; the apes’ clothing and armor is wonderfully well-designed; and the world is built with an eye for scale and spectacle. But underneath that impressive gloss (which occasionally feels almost distractingly overdesigned, viz Helena Bonham Carter’s Ari with her eyeliner and shaggy but unmistakably coiffed bob) the actors struggle to invest a paper-thin story with any real emotional heft, not helped by Mark Wahlberg delivering one of his most blank, bland and overwhelmed performances at the center. Worst of all, in a franchise kind of famous for spectacular dismounts, Burton’s films ends in a way that simply feels unearned, with a kind of unexplained gotcha! that seems more designed to cliffhanger us into a sequel than to actually round out a plot that has been until then both needlessly overcomplicated and thematically simplistic. Despite the film’s decent showing ($360 million worldwide) that sequel never came to pass, thank God–reportedly Burton himself said he “would rather jump out of a window” than do another ‘Apes,’ and the franchise, which had been dead on the big-screen for nearly 30 years was put on ice for another decade before being rebooted into “Rise of the Planet of the Apes,” which, while not a 100% home run, certainly seemed to have learned many of the lessons of Burton’s turgid misfire.
7. “Battle for the Planet of the Apes” (J. Lee Thomson, 1973)
The fifth and final entry in the original franchise ‘Battle’ is rightly regarded as the least of them, largely due to drastic budget reduction which led to skimping on things like production design and number of extras (it’s by far the emptiest ‘Apes’ film as regards people milling around in the background). It’s hard to get the same feeling of awe and epic scale that the series’ best installments can offer when you’re essentially watching ten guys squabble in a forest, and yet, shoddiness of staging and editing aside (take the risible climactic Caesar vs Aldo tree battle for a prime example of both) you can still see enough here story-wise to justify the fact that it forms the loose basis for this week’s triumphant ‘Dawn.’ Roddy McDowall returns as Caesar, some years (either 12 or 27, depending on who you believe) after the events of ‘Conquest,’ and this time he is the king of Ape City, an enclave of survivors from the war, in which apes and humans co-exist but the humans are distinctly subservient. The belligerent Aldo, the gorilla general of the ape army chafes against Caesar’s pacifism, however, and so while the film also has antagonists in the form of a mutated human army (again, of about ten, who ride to war on a school bus), it’s really more about the factionalism within the ape ranks. One casualty of that is the human characterization—while McDowall is strong again in his signature role, his assistant MacDonald (Austin Stoker) is the only human with any amount of dialogue apart from Severn Darden as the enjoyably batshit irradiated rebel General, and what he has is mostly expository. Still, there are flickers of previous ‘Apes’ movies’ nuances and politics—even the mutant humans get a speech in their defense by Caesar’s wife Lisa (Natalie Trundy), and if the ape vs mutant battle looks about as dramatic as a few kids playing soldiers around a bonfire, it still does call into question the value of pacifism in an interesting way. Interesting, but somewhat confused—it’s possible there is simply too much factionalism going on at this point, too many mini-internal conflicts, not to mention references to God, to work out the film’s overall position or philosophy. Still it does provide, as ever, a vehicle for a very peculiar kind of meta species self-disgust for us humans, as when Aldo the gorilla is found out to have committed ape-on-ape murder and MacDonald wryly observes that it “looks like they’ve joined the human race.” Poorly shot, carelessly thrown together and outside of McDowall and Darden rather listlessly acted, what’s surprising is that there’s still enough story juice here to power ‘Battle’ along, and almost enough to make the John Huston cameo that bookends the film and delivers its last reveal in the year 2670, oddly touching.
You can stream all Planet of the Apes Movies, TV series and animated series at planetoftheapes.tk
Btw great article
I know I\’m late to this party but I just ran across this article. I have not yet seen the newest films but have watched the first six numerous times. I would rate them 1 Planet
2 Conquest
3 Beneath
4 Battle
5 the Burton reboot (if only for casting Heston as an ape)
6 Beneath which is rock bottom due to absence of Roddy McDowall Coupled with general stupidity of the rest of the film.
Boy, can opinions about Planet of the Apes movies be so different. My favourites are (as a tie) Beneath and Conquest, followed by Escape, then Battle, and only then the original (which is too simple), and ending with its Burton\’s remake. I haven\’t seen the other XXI century sequel. I must go back and proclaim my surprise for the praise of the original PotA. It\’s too plain, too simple, nothing to make you think about (except the interesting ending).
Don\’t you just hate commentors like the above Dr.Zaius? Guess no one can have an opinion on the internet. Go start a blog and write your own.
It\’s not a bad list, and to be honest I\’ve only seen the first 3 films of the original series, Burtons POTA, and the two reboots of the series. So despite not seeing all the movies, my list goes like this:
1) Planet of the Apes
2) Dawn
3) Rise
4) Escape
5) Burtons (I actually enjoyed this film, Tim Roth alone was worth the price of admission)
5) Beneath
1. Conquest of the Planet of the Apes (1972) – This is my favorite by far. Great use of a limited, pre-made, functional environments to create a believable futuristic police-state environment. I also love brutalist architecture, and you get to see great examples of it that actually exist and are used! Most of it was filmed at a business park UC Irvine. You also really get to see the apes riot, which is fun.
Planet of the Apes (1968) – I just put it 2nd because it is the original.
Beneath the Planet of the Apes (1970) – I thought it was cool to see a different, secret part of life in the Planet of the Apes world. Did anyone else notice the nods to this in the new movie?
Rise of the planet of the Apes (2011) – I liked it because James Franco and it was based off of my favorite movie, although the coolest elements (the sets) were not there.
Dawn of the planet of the Apes (2014) – This was a gripping, intense movie. There were also a lot of parts that I found funny, but no one else in the theater seemed to. A little too video-game tropey for me though.
Battle for the Planet of the Apes (1973) – As I recall, I think I thought this was too dark and scary. The 2014 version is based off of this. The ending is nice but totally cheesy.
Escape from the Planet of the Apes (1971) – I donât really remember this one except for the end, but re-reading the plot – it sounds cheesy as hell. I remember the end was really sad and too violent 🙁
did not see 2001 version
I LOVE the whole series, but my list would be
1) PotA 1968 (in a movie series it is all but impossible for any movie to replace the original. Even if it is a better movie–if– the original is the innovator and originator and nothing beats that IMHO.)
2) Rise. Maybe not as well-made of a movie as Dawn but, to me, far more satisfying and exciting. It also is far more an enjoyable movie as Dawn is not just pessimistic but dreary throughout.
3) Dawn. Great f/x, very moving. But not as much action as was warranted, too much talking in static shots (Jason Clarke packing his bags, Jason Clarke writing in a book, the boy from Let Me In drawing), and the next battle is the one we want to see. I would have liked to see more scenes with the humans dealing with what has happened to humanity and struggling to prevent anything worse, more action with real consequences and 20 less minutes of talking and the opening hunting scene.
4) Conquest- the uncut version. Not a great movie (and how could apes have evolved so quickly by 1991??), but exciting and fun and fills in much desired gaps in the Apes timeline
5) Escape. Dated and cheesy. The soundtrack has a very 70's sound and the subplots of feminism and the shopping montage bring this movie down. Great opening scene, though, and the ending would be thrilling and chilling if the scene of the chimp weren't so obviously looped.
6) it's a redo of 1, but most sequels are. A pretty bad movie but I actually love the ending (pretty ballsy–spoilers– to not only destroy all of the main characters but destroy the entire planet with it. End spoilers. The mutants, the anti-war politics and the telepathy just make this awful.
7) PotA remake- absolutely no story, weird bestial romance allusions, weird female ape make up and the grossly overrated Marky Mark. The only good things are the make up, the f/x, and the fact that the Apes series was alive again, albeit briefly.
8) Battle. Looks so cheap it could have been filmed in someone's backyard. All talk and lofty ideals drag down this entry. The big scene amounts to people in motorcycles and school buses driving through fields. The only good things are Roddy was in it and it apparently helped free American hostages in Iran.
.
1. The original (not just because it's a great movie, but because of it's calculated impact)
2. Dawn of (powerful in almost every way…#2 only because it borrowed–and in many ways improved–in what's gone before)
3. Rise of (very well done reimagining)
4. Beneath the (everyone here seems intent on putting this on the bottom of the list…well except for the Burton abomination…but it's so full of cheesy political allegory that I prefer it to the rest)
5. Escape from (charming and funny)
6. Conquest of (still fun, but bordering on bad without trying to be…which is what "Beneath" felt like)
7. Battle for (also still fun, but again–seems like it took itself too seriously)
8. Nothing at all.
9. Burton's Crapper
1. The Original Planet of The Apes
2. The Prequel/Reboot Series
3. The Planet of The Apes Sequels
4. The Tim Burton Series
1. Planet
2. Conquest
3. Dawn
4. Rise
5. Escape
6. Beneath
7. Burton
One other bit of Apes related content you forgot is Planet of the Apes the Musical starring Troy McClure.
"I hate every ape I see. From chimpan-A to chimpan-Z"
I love how all the comments have people saying "you're wrong" and "you're crazy for putting this movie in so-so position" like somehow your opinion is more relevant or correct. It's just the author's opinion.
One of the many messages in all these movies has to do with arrogance with individuals thinking their way or opinion is the right one whether its humans or apes. It's what leads to all the conflicts in these movies.
It's alright to have an opinion but be respectful of others as well.
Having Dawn as the best of the bunch clearly shows that this list was primarily compiled to garner interest for the new film. I agree with MIKHAIL KAUFMAN, it felt rather empty and I left the theater wondering why anyone would watch it.
Beneath is the worst of the bunch. Far too bleak and cold. At least Burton's film had really fantastic make up work and some solid set pieces. It's really the ending that truly buried the remake. The original Planet of the Apes film is yet to be surpassed. As hugely successful and acclaimed as the current film is, it is still stunning you would rank it higher than the iconic original.
I'd be with you if it weren't for Jason Clarke… a solid performance there, and the new film has the weight it's designed to have. The guy just let really rich emotional material drop into the abyss time and time again. Clive Owen? Someone, not that guy. Terrible performance.
Almost totally agree with this list, but for a few exceptions.
1. Planet (Original)
2. Escape
3. Rise
4. Conquest
5. Dawn
6. Planet (Remake)
7. Beneath
8. Battle
Not sure why Dawn is so highly praised here and elsewhere. I found it rather empty from an expositional standpoint, which is mainly due to the lack of a good human element, and the apes mainly just grunting and signing. I also didn't think it set up the next film very well. It looks to be a 2-hour war scene (a la Matrix Revolutions), from this point, but we'll see. On a side-note, it seemed as though Beneath never intended to be an Apes movie to begin with, but I'm very happy it led to the often hilarious and almost bitingly satiric Escape. Also think Conquest was super heavy-handed, but very underrated.
I agree Dawn of the planet of the apes is definitely number one its the BEST MOVIE EVER!
Th newest is amazing bt I'm sorry there's NO WAY it's better than the original. Not even close. Very badly played.
they really should have stayed in the spirit of the org.. because these new ones are horrible remakes….
I guess I'm in the minority here, but I've always loved Beneath the Planet of the Apes the most of the sequels. It has its faults, but I appreciate how it starts out like a rehash of the first film until the latter half where it gets really out there. It also has to be the darkest, most nihilistic film ever released with a G rating.
"And the fellowship of the holy fall-out be amongst us" (from "Beneath"), no matter how often i hear that line (or see it written down) it always makes me fall about laughing.
Tim Roth is a pile of shit specifically because he is British.
I want to bugger Nova, what a gorgeous bird she was.
Roddy McDowall was a fairy, the bloody disgusting woofter.
How can anyone pick Rise of the Planet of the Apes as a top pick? Its banal. This author has NO sense of what the Planet of the Ape films are about-which are commentaries on race, the Cold War, and America's growing military and most importantly nuclear arsenal. Conquest of the Planet of the Apes, though clearly suffering from budget shortfall, is one of the most provocative and interesting social commentaries through science fiction on slavery, Black Power, and the urban riots of the 1960s. Although the studio executives forced the director to reshoot the end with a conciliatory tone, the true end of the film is an unforgiven allegory of America's violent racial history. In a society that refused to make films on slavery, Conquest of the Planet of the Apes is a hallmark film of deep social critique. The new films are droll and boring in comparison with no real social commentary whatsoever–all action and very little thought.
You're insane if you think Dawn is the best one. Rise and Dawn are great but they're very straightforward. There's not much going on beneath the surface. Here's my list…
1. Original
2. Escape
3. Conquest
4. Dawn
5. Rise
6. Beneath
7. Battle
8. Burton's (the makeup is amazing and Elfman's score is incredible but the movie is garbage)
What about Dunston Checks In?
Great article. I'd go with:
1. Escape ("meet baby Milo who has Washington terrified!")
2. Planet
3. Conquest
4. Battle ("Ape has never killed ape…let alone an ape child")
5. Dawn
6. Burton's version (mind blowing Tim Roth performance)
7. Beneath
8. Rise (terrible, almost no ape action)
enjoyed the review. well done. i agree with rankings 5 through 10 but I don\’t know if i\’d rank 1 through 4 in the same order. my first impulse is to rank planet of the apes as number 1, but i\’m not sure if it\’s because that\’s what i really think or if it\’s sentimentality speaking. honestly i don\’t know if I can rank the films in the 1 through 4 position. it\’d be a competition, and i don\’t always want to be critical enough to rate and rank films that i really like. it would take away from the enjoyment of the films themselves. guess i\’d never make it as a film critic!